Sporkings: Mockery of badfic with commentary… sometimes with the special guest-stars, MCR themselves! Because I like scarring them in my mind.
Quotes/Extracts: The best bits/scenes/dialogue from badfic all over. May Definitely will induce cringing.
Links: To my favourite badfics, or those I’m too lazy to spork… or those which don’t need it because they’re that terrible.
Title: We’re Young and We Don’t Care
Summary: Frank and Secret have been best friends since birth so what happens when it turns into something more?
FRANK: Turns into something more? Like… evolution? Can it evolve into a good story?
MIKEY: Dude, her name is Secret… I think that prospect has already been mercilessly crushed.
{The first chapter is boring information on the characters (holy crap they have a lot of tattoos for underage teenagers) so moving swiftly on…}
“Cupcake!” I turned around to find none other than Pete Wentz and Frank Iero,
GERARD: You mean Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz the Third and Frank Anthony Iero. You know, since we’re being specific.
two of my best friends since practically birth. For as long as I can remember we have been inseparable and getting into trouble together.
“Hey Petey Panda, Hey Frankenstein!” I yelled back.
FRANK: You’re called Frank and you get ONE Frankenstein tattoo…
GERARD: You have two, Frankenstein.
MIKEY: I’m more worried about ‘Cupcake’. Does she taste as delicious as she sounds?
GERARD: I don’t know but I have a feeling Frank will be finding out later…
“I want ice cream Cupcake, can we go bother ‘Trick?”
“No Pete, we are gonna end up getting him fired”
“Aww come on Seek, I want ice cream too”
“No Frankie” but of course they both give me those puppy dog eyes and adorable pouts they are so famous for and I of course give in. I mean who can honestly say no to that?
GERARD: Anybody who spends more than five minutes with Frank being an annoying asshole.
MIKEY: Never mind that, who’s ‘Trick and Seek? Pete? Cupcake? Frankie? My head hurts.
“Okay guys but please be good and try not to break anything this time?!”
The last time we were there Pete managed to break two chairs and a table trying to play hopscotch. Frank broke a cash register and I still have yet to figure out how in the hell he did it.
RAY: That’s Frank’s super-power.
FRANK: I can totally see ‘Never fear, Cash-Register-Breaking-Man is here!’ catching on.
“Hey, that was just one time and it was an accident. It’s not my fault the chairs hate me and the table was grumpy” Pete pouted.
“And I still say that cash register tried to bite me” Frank added.
FRANK: Saving people from savage cash registers all over the land!
“Oh guys” I grinned and rolled my eyes at them before jumping on Frank’s back.
“Carry me to the ice cream Frankie!”
Frank took off running and spinning me around in circles.
MIKEY: Running and spinning and carrying a fifteen year old girl? Hey, there’s your other super-power, Frank!
“Frankie I’m gonna throw up, stop spinning me” I whined in between giggles.
When we got to the ice cream shop we found most of our friends including Gerard, his brother Mikey, Patrick, Ryan, Gabe, William, and Ray already there.
RAY: It’s about time I got a feature.
GERARD: Is this gonna have everybody in a band we’ve so much as looked at over the last few years in it?
“Hey everyone, what’s up?” I called, waving at everyone.
“Hey Secret, Hey Frank, Hey Pete” everyone called back.
RAY: Secret had been training them for a long time to get the synchronised greeting down. Almost as long as she’d been training Frank to be her loyal steed and carry her to the ice-cream.
“Where’s Bren…thmmfff” I started to ask where Brendon was but I suddenly found myself squished under a giggling Brendon who was trying to tickle me to death.
“Ahhh! Brendon stop it! I am seriously going to piss myself!”
“Not unless you buy me some ice cream”
“Okay Bren, stop it and I will buy you as much as you want’
“Yay! Score one for me!” Brendon squealed jumping up and down like a total spaz.
“Okay, who gave Brendon red bull again?”
“For real, it’s not like he needs it” Ryan snorted from where he was sandwiched between Ray and Gabe.
“Hey, no fair, you guys love me anyways, right?” Brendon crossed his arms and pouted at us.
“Yes, of course we do but seriously, who gave you red bull?” Frank questioned from his seat between me and Gerard.
“If I tell you he won’t give me anymore” Brendon gave us his best pout and puppy dog eyes.
“Tell me or no ice cream” I teased him, knowing full well I could never deprive him for real.
Brendon’s eyes widened and he shouted” Mikey did it!”
“MIKEY!!!” everyone groaned in unison.
GERARD: MIKEY. LOOK WHAT YOU DID.
MIKEY: Hey! I did no such thing!
FRANK: Goddammit Mikey, nobody wants a ‘hyper’ Brendon in fanfiction. He’ll be demanding skittles next.
“Oh come on guys, he’s not that bad” Mikey grinned but then ducked behind Gerard as I sent my shoe flying towards his head.
“Secret, don’t abuse Mikey and Mikey, stop giving Brendon red bull. Now, who wants ice cream?” I turned around to see Patrick grinning with an ice cream scoop in his hand.
MIKEY: Thank you, Patrick!
BOB: Is she still on Frank’s back? Poor dude.
FRANK: I’m more concerned over the fact she’s carrying shoes around to throw at people.
“Trick!” I squealed, launching myself towards him for a hug.
“Hey to you too, Seek”
” I heard ice cream” Pete ran over and joined in on my hug attack on Patrick.
“Okay guys, I love you too. So, does everyone want ice cream?”
” Yes Trick” everyone cheered in response.
RAY: They really have this synchronised thing down a pat.
“Okay, let’s see if I can remember this. Rainbow sherbet for Secret, Pete wants peanut butter and chocolate, Frank gets orange sherbet, chocolate for Brendon, Mikey wants strawberry, Gerard wants vanilla, bubble gum for Gabe, William gets mint chocolate chip, Ryan wants pistachio, and Ray wants cookies and cream?”
MIKEY: Why does he keep switching between ‘for’, ‘wants’ and ‘gets’?
FRANK: Because me and William get no choice, apparently.
GERARD: Well, at least I get vanilla. What’s up with all the complicated shit?
FRANK: Just because you’re vanilla, Gerard, doesn’t mean everybody has to be.
GERARD: I feel like that was a dig at my sexual preferences…
FRANK: Damn straight it was.
“Damn you’re good” I grinned at him.
FRANK: In bed, she means.
GERARD: Dude, that’s Patrick.
FRANK: Well, it’ll come up at some point… might as well get it out now.
RAY: … that’s what she said?
“Yeah, well you guys are always in here so it’s not that hard to remember”
After everyone got their ice cream we gathered around a table and began eating but then suddenly I felt a cold, wet substance sliding down my cheek and I turned to find the culprit. Of course I see Frank trying to suppress a giggle.
RAY: After throwing what was left of his dignity in her face. It was cold and wet with its tears of humiliation.
“Frankie, I am so gonna kick your ass!”
“Oh yeah? Well, you gotta catch me first” he called and ran out the door so I jumped up and followed him out. I chased him around until he finally tackled me and started licking my face.
“Mmmm you taste good”
GERARD: I called it first!
FRANK: … is this normal behaviour for teenagers? I feel like I missed out on a lot.
“Oh I bet I do” I smirked back at him.
“Ooo I want some too” Gabe grinned and joined Frank’s licking attack on me.
” Ewww, stop using Secret as a human ice cream cone” I heard my friend Alyx say.
MIKEY: Yeah, everyone knows she’s a cupcake.
FRANK: Just like Gerard.
GERARD: Fuck you, Frankenstein.
“Alyx!” I jumped up and kiss attacked her.
“Nice to see you too, Seek” she smiled “So are we still having a sleepover at your house tonight?”
“Of course Alyx, don’t forget the popcorn”
“See you at six then” she grinned and hugged me before turning to kiss Pete and leaving.
“Okay, I gotta get home before my mom freaks out but I’ll see everyone at six, right?”
“Of course” Frank said and squeezed me in a tight hug before I turned and left.
MIKEY: Did he hug her ankles?
FRANK: Fuck off, I’m not that short.
MIKEY: You’re not, but you didn’t get up. It seems rude to hug someone from the ground.
BOB: Does nobody care about the others? She just left without saying goodbye!
GERARD: … wait, you’re still here?
BOB: See, I know how they must feel.
Title: Orphans?
Summary: Avenge Carterson is in the orphanage, so who picks her up?
GERARD: Thank god for the summary. With such a cryptic title, I had no clue what to expect.
FRANK: Five bucks she gets picked up by one of us and falls in love with another.
MIKEY: The potential for squick here is amazing.
Orphans?
I sat up at our dinning hall by myself. I was pulling my sweatshirt over my wrists, before someone touched my shoulder. It was Ms. Granite.
“May I help you?” I asked politely, taking this old woman back.
RAY: Why does this old woman need taking back? Back where? Did she escape a nursing home? Is this a regular occurrence? Why does nobody care? Is she a minor character or a ma—
MIKEY: Oh my god, just shut up. You’re worse than the story!
“Yes. Some one is here to see you.” She said and walked back to the office, I quickly followed her.
“Who?” I asked, she pushed me into a room. A red haired man was sitting, his back from me. I sat next to him, not even glancing. “Hi.” He said, the voice was familiar.
MIKEY: It was… Ron Weasley!
FRANK: Fuck off, it was definitely Chucky.
RAY: Maybe it was Dexter.
MIKEY: Or Archie?
GERARD: I hate you guys.
“Hey.” I said, staring at the wall. Ms. Rose looked at me.
RAY: I though she was called Ms. Granite.
FRANK: Maybe she’s Ms. Granite Rose? Sounds kinda poetic.
I turned towards the guy. My eyes went wide, happiness snuck through.
“I’m Gerard.” He said sticking his hand out, I shook it.
“Avenge.” I said, and gave him a faint smiled. Ms. Rose got up; she left us here to get to know each other.
GERARD: … she’s called Avenge. Oh, that’s even worse than Secret.
FRANK: AVENGE THIS ATROCITY!
MIKEY: You’re the one who named your sprog Bandit, Gerard. You can’t talk.
“So, tell me about Avenge!” He said, he sounded exited.
RAY: I’d have exited too, at that point.
I shook my head. He smiled.
“Come on, by the way you’re blushing, you know who I am, or you like me.” He said flirtatiously, so I hugged him.
FRANK: ‘Flirtatiously’?
GERARD: … it’s bad when you freak yourself out, right?
MIKEY: Dude, that’s your future daughter. Keep it in your pants!
“Yes! Mr. Way, I know who you are!” I said, he smiled. I let him go.
“So, what do you like?” I smiled at the question.
“A lot that I can’t have. Hmm. I love, The Smashing Pumpkins, Astro Zombie by the Misfits, Mushroom head, Mcr, Msi, leather Mouth, Pencey Prep, hmmm…” I zoned out, I was brought back from my world by Gerard giggling.
GERARD: Because she just listed off every cliché band to like in an MCR fanfiction ever. And only ‘Astro Zombies’ by the Misfits? What about the rest of their stuff?
FRANK: They have OTHER stuff we haven’t covered?
“Oh! I like playing my guitar. I know some Fray, MSI, Cancer, and the American Rejects!” I said, he smiled.
“Okay. How’s life here?” He asked. I cringed.
“Here? I would rather be dead, but they have special counseling I had to go to. They think I’m perfect now.” I said, I looked away. “I shouldn’t have said that, you must think I’m a freak!”
FRANK: I certainly do.
GERARD: Ssh, that’s my future daughter you’re insulting!
II said and closed my eyes, there was a hand on my shoulder, I opened my eyes, and he smiled.
“Ms.Rose?” He called out. “I think she is coming home to my family.” He said. I jumped into his arms, but I NEVER let my hoodie up, and I never will.
GERARD: … that’s not how adoption works.
The drive back was fine, then we got out of the car. I grabbed my bag and old guitar case. Then we walked in, he smiled, someone came around the corner.
GERARD: … that’s REALLY not how it works.
A short guy, with hundreds of tats… “Hey there sweetie.” He said, I hugged him. Gerard smiled. “I’m Frank.” He said, I smiled. “She knows us huh?” He asked Gerard, he nodded, Frank smiled. He grasped my guitar case. “Come on!” He said excitedly, and started walking. I followed him until we were in the family room. Then there were squeals and 3 little toddlers ran up.
GERARD: Wait, Frank, you’re living with us? Can’t you afford your own fucking place, you freeloader?
“You must be Bandit. You have hazel eyes. And you two should be Cherry and Lilly! You take after Frank and Jamia!” I squealed picking each one up.
FRANK: Leave my babies out of this!
“Sissy?” Bandit said, I smiled and looked at Gerard, he smiled, and I crouched until I was at her height.
FRANK: It’s nice to see you teaching your daughter effeminate slurs, Gerard.
MIKEY: I think she means sister.
FRANK: Oh. Wait, does she ask every new person if they’re her sister? Like, ‘Sissy!’ ‘No, Bandit, that’s a dog.’
“Sissy!” I said and she hugged me. I was…happy.
Then something happened, Frank screamed. There was a spider by him, I ran over and stomped on it, Frank stayed there a second. Lilly went up to it and picked it up, Frank was frozen so I took it from her. I lifted her up. “Come ion Lilly, let’s see if your dad is going to be a statue.!” I poked him, he got out of a trance. I handed him Lilly.
FRANK: … I have no words.
MIKEY: Bandit says you’re a sissy.
The bassist if MSI ran in. “I herd Frank scream! Who took his skittles?” She eyed the little ones, I giggled.
GERARD: Her name’s Lyn-Z. My wife’s name is Lyn-Z.
“Spider!” Frank said, Lyn- nodded.
GERARD: LYN-FUCKING-Z.
RAY: Lyn’s fucking who now?
“Now who is the teenager in my front room?” She said, Gerard smiled.
“This is your new daughter!” He said.
FRANK: Gerard, that’s not how you bring up the topic of adoption with your wife.
MIKEY: This story is treating adoption like something you do on a whim. ‘Oh, I need some milk and bread… might as well pick up a sixteen-year-old kid whilst I’m out! I’m sure my wife and child will understand!’
She squealed and hugged me, and then there were more footsteps. Mikey came around the other corner.
“Gerard? You home?” He said, then saw me. “Oh hello?” He said, confused.
MIKEY: Confused because… well, when did I start living with you idiots as well?
Gerard giggled. “You’re an uncle Mikes!” He cheered,
MIKEY: I already was though…
Mikey swept me up and spun me around. I shrieked and giggled. “He gets exited, lets just say, he held bandit before me.” Gerard said, Mikey stuck his tongue out.
“You passed out!” He said defensibly, Gerard blushed. I giggled, and realized I was still in Mikey’s arms. I squeezed him harder and let go. He smiled, Ray walked in, “FRANK! WHY DID- Oh hey.” He said smiling.
RAY: Are we all living together like some kind of cult?
FRANK: Dibs on the master bedroom!
I giggled again, “Hi Ray, how do you do?” I said in a British voice,
RAY: The British have thousands of regional accents. Which one?
FRANK: Obviously cockney, china plate! Would you Adam and Eve it?
RAY: I’ll put my knee in your cock in a minute if you don’t shut up, Frank.
he laughed and hugged me. I hugged back, and then there was a squeal and 4 arms wrapped around me. Frank giggled.
“Baby, you’re suffocating her!” He said laughing. They un latched and I hugged Jamia, then hugged Alicia. I saw someone in Ray’s arms, she hugged me. Christa was strong. I smiled.
GERARD: Wives! What is this fuckery? Aren’t we meant to be screwing each other?
FRANK: Somebody’s eager.
GERARD: I’m just saying!
“Come on, let’s go find you a room, we have attic, or basement.” Gerard said, I smile.
“The attic is fine.” I said, I love attics. I walked in, it was perfect, I had the whole top to myself.
They left me to put my stuff away, and then we were going to eat dinner. I sat by Frank, Frank smiled and we started eating.
Half way I moved my arm and my sleeve pulled up, Frank hit my knee with his and pulled it down. I glanced over, he was scowling, and was eating carefully. I was barely eating. He slipped a hand into mine, which was resting near me thigh.
GERARD: Frank, stop molesting my daughter.
FRANK: Hey, I’m just being friendly!
After dinner, I said I was going to bed. 5 minutes after I got there, Frank knocked. I let him in.
“Please take the hoodies off?” He asked, pleading with his eyes.
FRANK: … very friendly, apparently.
I backed away some, and shook my head. He peeled his hoodies off, that’s all he was wearing. He had scars all over his arms, they got deeper as they went up. He looked away, some where open…
FRANK: Like your momma’s legs! BOOM!
MIKEY: Frank, stop it.
FRANK: That’s NOT what she said!
“Frank. Please tell me why, this is what you want stopped.” I said. I was worried.
“I scratch at them.” He said, still not looking at me. I shook my head, that’s a lie.
He sighed, “There isn’t a reason, it’s an addiction. Now, your turn.” He said moving closer. He reached for my hoodies, when Gerard walked in.
GERARD: Because I obviously have something extremely important to get from my new daughter’s attic bedroom, right?
“The fuck?!” He yelled, Frank yanked my hoodie up anyway. Doesn’t it matter he thinks frank’s trying to get in my pants.
FRANK: Actually, that KIND OF DOES MATTER.
Gerard grabbed him; frank shoved him out the door, locking it. Scars ran up all the way down my arms. I lifted my shirt a couple inches, there were some there to. So, I was wearing a tank, and some blue jeans. Gerard was pounding on the door. Frank carefully ran his hands over the new ones, now others were out there.
“Frank is fucking my daughter!?” Lyn-z yelled, I shrieked.
FRANK: FRIENDLY. I’M JUST BEING FRIENDLY.
“NO HE IS NOT!” Me and Frank yelled, there was more banging.
MIKEY: Of sixteen-year-olds.
“Then let me in Iero!” Gerard yelled through the door, Frank through me his sweatshirt, I put it on, Frank opened the door. There was yelling, Jamia was crying, Lyn-z tried to talk to me. I ignored her, I ran to the bathroom.
RAY: I feel like somebody stole a period there. Or maybe a semi-colon.
I sat on the edge of the tub, when I herd Frank screaming to get off him, or get me.
FRANK: Or get me off.
There was banging on the door. “LET ME IN! HUN! DO NOT CUT! PLEASE!” Frank begged through the door, but I already made a line, and was going to do another when the door was knocked in, Frank stood there for about a second before he ran to me, He grasped me over my cuts “OH FUCK!” I yelled, he led me too his room,
FRANK: Which is the master bedroom, I hope. I called dibs!
the others watching in amazement, he told me to grasp the cuts tightly, I did. He rummaged through some stuff, and then pulled out some bandages. He bandaged it up quickly. Kind of like an expert. I watched as he ran water over each cut, and then led me to the bathroom.
GERARD: Dude, you bandaged them and then washed them? And you managed to wash them before going into the bathroom?
FRANK: I think that’s something else to add to my repertoire of super-powers.
RAY: I’m not sure what kind of ‘expert’ he is but it’s certainly not in first-aid.
He sat me on the side of the tub and lightly lifted my shirt a couple inches and did the same.
“You’re so skinny Avenge…” He said looking into my eyes. My throat went dry.
I croaked out “Sorry” to everyone and ran to my room. I didn’t tell him why, and I didn’t care too. I jumped on my bed and fell asleep crying. I wished I could just disappear.
When I got up, I packed my bags. They were going to send me back. Why wouldn’t they.
GERARD: … um. Can you even send kids you’ve adopted back like that? Isn’t there some kind of paperwork involved?
MIKEY: Don’t be silly, bro. Kids are like clothes – full refunds if you return them undamaged within thirty days!
GERARD: I wish I’d known that when you were born.
Someone walked in. “Hun, why are you packing?” Mikey asked. I cringed at his voice.
GERARD: It is rather annoying.
MIKEY: Hey!
He shut the door, and locked it. I sat on my bed. He sat with me.
“Avenge, you can’t ignore me.” He said, I ignored him.
FRANK: Ooh, you rebel, Avenge!
Then something weird happened, he tickled me.
I fell over onto my bed, he tickled my sides.
“OKAY I’ll talk!” I said, he stopped.
GERARD: I give you Michael James Way, master of tickle torture!
I sat against the wall. He got closer to me. I sighed and lay against his chest.
“Gerard, he’s going to send me back.” I whispered. I whispered to Mikey.
RAY: Department of redundancy department. How may I help in helping you today?
He shook my head.
MIKEY: … I shook HER head?
FRANK: You’re a wizard, Mikey!
“Why would he do that?” He asked.
“Because I am a freak and-“ Mikey cut us off.
“He’s a freak too.
FRANK: True.
GERARD: Hey!
He cut too. He felt like nothing too. He knows how you feel, why would he give up? We all felt like that, even Ray did! But we didn’t give up. Frank sure hasn’t! Gerard was scared when he thought you and Frank were together, he was relieved when he saw Frank help.” Mikey said playing with my hair, I was still laying in his chest.
MIKEY: Wait, IN my chest?
FRANK: Gross.
RAY: That’s kind of taking ‘keeping someone close to your heart’ to a whole other level, huh?
“Thanks” I said and started unpacking again, he nodded and left. I walked down at lunch. Eyes were on me as I walked to the cupboards and grabbed a cup, I got a glass of water and walked away, they probably were staring at the bandages that Frank wrapped me in. They were thin, and there was blood on them. Only Frank saw the ones on my stomach, but he didn’t see the ones on my thighs or legs. Worst thing is, they have a pool, and it’s summer.
FRANK: My soul is crying. Please tell me there’s no more of this.
GERARD: Not much, don’t worry.
FRANK: Oh thank god. How many chapters?
GERARD: … fourteen.
FRANK: My soul has now curled up into a foetal position and is banging its head against the wall repeatedly. Thanks a lot, Gerard.
{Submitted by rollerbaby. Thank you!}
Title: And we could run away… If we could run away… From here!
Summary: Hey guys, this is the start of a new fic I have been working on, the MCR boys are all 16, so its cool :) p.s: I lied, sorry guys, I (Broken Arrow, or Arrow for short) have brown eyes. Not green, I…
FRANK: If I could have run away, I would have already.
GERARD: Do these girls know what we all looked like at sixteen? It really wasn’t pretty.
FRANK: Speak for yourself, G. I was a sex god at sixteen!
RAY: I don’t know, man. Most sex gods don’t get out of breath walking up stairs.
And we could run away… If we could run away… From here!
“BOO” Arrow shouted, laughing as she jumped on her sister’s bed.
FRANK: She laughed a lot less when she was promptly kicked in the gut by said sister.
GERARD: … Arrow. They’re getting worse. Help.
“MMRRFFF” groaned Poison, shoving her sister off the bed, and swinging her legs, so her feet were on the bedroom floor.
MIKEY: Gerard, look. It’s you if you were a teenage girl.
FRANK: You mean he isn’t? So how do you explain the PMSing?
GERARD: Fuck you, Frankenstein.
FRANK: TWO TATTOOS. TWO.
“Its Monday, lazy arse. Time for school!” Arrow shouted, from the bathroom.
“I know, dweeb. Don’t remind me…” Muttered Poison, scrabbling around for clothes and school books, shoving what she found into a red and black checkered satchel.
RAY: Shouted, groaned, muttered… somebody likes their thesaurus.
FRANK: “I concur,” I ejaculated cockily.
Arrow emerged from the bathroom 5 minutes later, with wet hair and wearing black skinny jeans, a red t-shirt, and a old army jacket. “shower’s free!” she shouted.
Poison went to get a shower as Arrow blow dried her and applied eyeliner.
Ten minutes Poison swung open the bathroom door, wearing red skinny jeans, a black t-shirt, and a “Missfits” hoodie.
FRANK: You hear that?
BOB: What?
FRANK: That humming. That’s Danzig boring his way through middle earth at 150 miles per hour to come smack that girl.
“…You… Look… Like… SHIT!” laughed Arrow, jokingly.
RAY: You mean you laugh jokingly? I’ve only been doing it seriously! Oh, I’ve been doing it wrong all these years.
“You cant say much!” Giggled Poison, applying eyeliner as Arrow dried her hair for her.
~
After they were done getting ready, Arrow and Poison sauntered down the stairs to the kitchen.
Arrow shoved some pop-tarts in the toaster, as Poison sat at the breakfast bar.
“…I hate school.” Grumbled Poison. “Why were you so eager to get up?”
“New kids.” Said Arrow, grinning. “I like new kids. New year, new kids.”
MIKEY: New brain?
RAY: Stop being so hopeful, Mikey. You’re making me look cynical.
Poison just laughed at her sisters absurdity.
GERARD: Finally something I can relate to!
Poison and Arrow are sisters, born 46 days apart. They have different mothers. They lived in a large house, just out of town, with their father. Who never seemed to be home, he was always out somewhere on a buisness trips.
BOB: And the parent of the year award goes to…
Poison and Arrow didn’t mind, it just meant they could do what they liked.
Poison was tall with silky chocolate brown hair, with a side fringe and the tips dyed black and white checks.
GERARD: … checkered hair?
FRANK: It’s in case she gets bored in class or on long journeys. She can play chess on herself!
Her hair reached her waist, and she had sparkling chocolate eyes to match.
RAY: Her hair sparkled and was made of chocolate?
FRANK: I’d date a girl with chocolate hair.
Her slender figure went well with her hight, so she could easily pass for 18, even though she was only 16.
Arrow on the other hand, was considerably shorter than her sister. She had almost-black hair down past her shoulders with the ends dyed electric blue. Her hair was curly, where as Poisons was straight.
FRANK: Nothing about Poison is straight.
GERARD: That was a low blow.
The main difference between the girls, other than height was eye colour. Poison has brown eyes, where as Arrow had bright green eyes.
“Pop-tarts are ready!” Anounced Arrow, shoving them onto a plate.
Arrow picked one up and shoved it in her mouth.
“EWWW! GROSS!” Giggled Poison.
“Saves time” Replied Arrow, with a mouth full of pop-tart.
~
Later, at about 10:00 am, the bus arrived. The girls picked up their bags and got on.
A series of whispers started as the girls walked to the back of the bus to their usual seats.
RAY: That’s it? That’s a whole chapter?
GERARD: So… they got up… dressed… and left?
MIKEY: Hopefully permanently.
FRANK: There’s too much action in this story right now. I can’t handle it. I’m on the edge of my seat with every line.
Poison whipped headphones and her iPhone out her pocket, nudged Arrow, and they began listening to music.
Music was a good way to escape the outside world… It blocked out the abusive comments of “Emo-kids” and other bullshit.
~
The bus jolted to a halt.
The grim-faced kids filed off, reluctantly, not wanting to go back to lessons and early mornings.
GERARD: Back to early mornings? Are they time-travellers?
FRANK: That would explain a lot.
GERARD: Really?
FRANK: No, not at all.
Arrow and Poison waited for everyone to get off, before joining the back of the line.
The walked down the isle
RAY: When did the bus turn into an island?
and then Arrow shoved poison down the stairs exiting the bus.
“BITCH!” Poison said to the grinning face of her sister at the top of the stairs.
Arrow jumped down, almost kicking Poison as she fell.
MIKEY: I can feel the love here.
FRANK: And yet when I push people down the stairs, it’s ‘reckless’ and ‘dangerous’ and then they get the damn police involved. Unfair!
“HEY! ARSE HOLES!” A voice shouted.
Poison stood protectively in front of her little sister, looking round for the owner of the voice.
Arrow pinched her sister, and said “Hey, stupid, its Elf and Georgie!” Dragging her sister over to the two smiling faces of their only two friends.
“Howdy, bitchess!” Grinned Poison, using their usual greeting of ‘some form of saying hello, then a insult’.
RAY: ‘Howdy, bitches’? Well, no wonder they’re their only two friends.
GERARD: Elf. Her name is Elf.
MIKEY: You getting ideas for your next kid’s name, bro?
“WHOS READY FOR THE NEW KIDS?! BRING ON THE FREAKING NEW KIDS!!!” Shouted Arrow, sounding more than slightly insane.
RAY: You can say that aga– no, Frank, not literally. Close your mouth.
“What the fuck is with YOU, and NEW KIDS?!” Asked ELF.
“…They don’t bloody well already hate us!” Grinned Arrow, laughing at the miss-fortune of their social lives. If you could call what they had ‘social lives’.
Georgia and ELF had been best friends with Poison and Arrow since kindergarten.
They were all social out casts, so they stuck together through out the years.
And, there was the fact, they enjoyed each others company too…
MIKEY: You mean you’re meant to enjoy the company of your friends?
RAY: Another thing I’ve been doing wrong! Thank god there’s this story to set me straight.
FRANK: Please insert a shitty gay joke here.
Georgia was a small, bouncy ginger girl. She and Arrow shared a birthday, so they always refered to themsleves as ‘twins’.
ELF, was a slightly taller than Georgie and Arrow, Athletic, blonde girl.
RAY: I guess this is where all those stolen commas from other stories ended up.
She had the name ELF, as her initals Eleanor, Lewis-Frost, and in her earlier years, was quite short, and was seen as Elf-like.
FRANK: Gerard, can you change your last name to something beginning with ‘y’?
GERARD: Uh… why?
FRANK: Yes, ‘y’. So I can call you GAY.
GERARD: …. you’re hilarious.
~
“SO?” Asked Georgie, as the 4 girls walked to their homerooms.
RAY: So is not a proper, stand-alone question. It cannot be asked like that. It is a prompt.
FRANK: So?
“…What?” Replied ELF.
GERARD: I’m still a rockstar! I got my rock moves. And I don’t need you.
“I GOT A HAIR-CUT. THATS WHAT.” Shouted Georgie.
“And…?” Asked Poison, ELF, and Arrow, at the same time.
RAY: I wish we were as synchronised as the people in these stories.
“Do you like it?” Asked Georgie in a seemingly angelic way, compared to her recent shouting.
All 4 girls laughed like loonatics.
“I think I speak for all of us, when I say, its lovely!” Said Poison.
“Thanks!!!” Said Georgie, before hugging each girl, and dragging her and ELF, into their homeroom.
“BYEEE!” Arrow called, into the room, as the door closed.
FRANK: How can there be two whole chapters dedicated to them just going to school?
GERARD: Well, there’s so much story to tell! They have to spread it out or you’d be overwhelmed!
BOB: This story has made me hate life.
GERARD: … you’re still here?
Poison and Arrow, slowly wandered down to their shared homeroom.
Arrow swung open the door.
“Your late.” Mr. Dixon hissed, glaring at Poison and Arrow, as they walked to their seats.
RAY: My late what?
FRANK: Period.
RAY: No, the full stop was too early.
FRANK: Annnnnnd whoosh! Straight over his head!
A few moments later the door opened.
A short, black haired with a sidefringe kid wearing a ‘leATHERMOUTH’ shirt,
FRANK: Oh no.
and skinny jeans shuffled into the classroom, followed by Mrs. Gahlik.
“This is Frank Iero. Hes new.” She muttered to Mr. Dixon.
“Well. Everyone, this is…” Said Mr. Dixon, trailing off.
BOB: Come on. She just said!
“Frank. Iero.” Said Frank, finishing his sentence off for him.
RAY: Hold on, is this is set after 2007? ‘cause that’s when Leathermouth formed.
FRANK: I’m… twenty-six? And still going to school?
GERARD: Were you not paying attention at all? You’re sixteen! It said so at the start!
FRANK: But… I got Leathermouth off the ground! That hasn’t happened if I’m sixteen!
RAY: Child, logic has no place in these stories.
“NEW KID. NEW KID. NEW KID. NEEEWWW KIDD!” Arrow stage-whispered in her sister’s ear.
“…I saw, stupid.” Poison replied, bluntly.
“Take your seat.” Mr. Dixon said to Frank.
Frank looked around, the only seat left was in about the middle of the room…
He walked over.
The seat was 3 rows in front of Poison and Arrow.
“OMFG!! HES WEARING A ‘leATHERMOUTH’ SHIRT! WE LOVE THEM, POISON!!” Arrow stage-whispered to Poison.
FRANK: YES, POISON. WE LOVE THEM. LOVE. LOVE. LOVE.
GERARD: Stop screaming in my ear, Frank.
“Shut up. He can hear you. The whole class can…” Muttered Poison, studding Frank, in the way she always does, with people.
FRANK: Studding? Ow! I don’t want to be bedazzled!
Frank turned around, to give a strange look to the girls talking about him, behind him.
Arrow saw Frank turn around, and gave him a huge, creepy grin.
He smiled a worried “Uhh… Hai, creeper” kind of smile, back.
RAY: Trust your gut, Frank! Run! Run far away!
Poison gave him a sympathtic, im sorry about my crazy sister kind of look.
He smiled back at Poison gratefully.
The bell rang.
“Time for class, everyone.” Said Mr. Dixon, motioning for everyone to leave.
“Got english, see you laterrr!” Said Arrow, leaving her sister,
MIKEY: To die?
RAY: … well, that’s still hopeful but more cynical, at least.
after giving her a quick hug.
Poison waited for the crowds of people going to class to die down.
She spotted Frank, looking confused at a bit of paper.
Being a kind girl, she walked over, and said “Do you know where to go next?”
Frank looked startled.
“Ummm… No, I have maths with Mrs. Bramley… Do you know where that is?” He stammered.
“Yeah! I have her now! We can walk together!” Poison, smiled, kindly.
“Oh… Thanks!” Frank answered, giving her a shy smile.
GERARD: Frankie’s in loooooove!
FRANK: Gerard’s an asshoooooole!
MIKEY: Can’t we just skip to the good bit already?
RAY: You’re out of luck. There is no good bit.
Title: Star crossed lovers
Summary: None provided.
MIKEY: Something already tells me the author doesn’t understand what star-crossed lovers actually means.
RAY: Nonsense! This story will match up to classic star-crossed lovers the likes of Romeo and Juilet, Tristan and Isodole, Troilus and Cressida…
FRANK: Buffy and Angel? Anakin and Padmé? Ooh, Cloud and Aerith?
RAY: Okay, that last one physically hurt, Frank.
Info:::
the guys are about 16-17 and in highschool
all are single :D
GERARD: Yeah, because no girls would look at us twice in highschool.
samantha way: Mikeys twin :D
GERARD: I have a sister?
MIKEY: … I have a twin?
her best friend is Sydney Bryar and they have been besties sence they were 4 she has brown hair but she dyed it black and has one blue streak on the side. you were really close to gerard
GERARD: I feel like I should have known that she existed then.
but even closer to mikey she also prefers to be called sam
Sydney Bryar: your brother is Bob bryar
BOB: Um.
FRANK: Dude! You have a sister? Is she hot?
BOB: Touch my fictional sister and you’re dead, Iero!
and ur
RAY: Can I buy a vowel, please?
really close to him. your bestie is Sam Way. your hair is black with a purple streak on the side.
MIKEY: No, no, and no, it’s not. This person is awful at guessing.
RAY: I think we’re meant to be her, not ourselves, Mikey.
MIKEY: Oh. That makes more sense.
you play the drums, bass, guitar, and u can sing real well.
GERARD: Holy crap, it’s Patrick Stump in girl form.
you and sam both went to a private school for 3 years and ur just getting back for the first time in 3 years. thats where the story begins::::
RAY: Can I also buy some capital letters?
“SYDNEY!!! we are gunna be LAATTEE!!!”
RAY: Thanks… that’s… better.
GERARD: I wish I could turn into a latte.
FRANK: I’d drink you any day.
you said to your room mate, your best friend and ur “sister”, sydney
MIKEY: Bob! We’re ‘brothers’ too then!
BOB: No. Leave me alone.
“HOLD ON I CANT FIND MY DRUMSTICKS!!!!” she called back
“ughhh” you grumbled and grabed your bags… you and sydney were born one month apart and you were both 16. and sence you went to an advanced academy, you both graduated from St. Marys borading school.
RAY: Did they not teach spelling and grammar there?
MIKEY: They’re advanced, Ray. There’s no room for trivial things like proper use of the English language in their lives.
“FOUND THEM” sydney called from under the bed. you smiled and rolled your beautiful green eyes
FRANK: Beautiful green eyes? Thanks. I grew them myself.
and left the room, sydney following you.
Once you were on the train that was taking you to your home town in New Jearsy, you and sydney changed from your uniforms to your normal clothes.
FRANK: Wizards! I knew it!
in the past three years, you and sydney changed greatly.
GERARD: I didn’t know changing clothes took so long. Or that you could do it ‘greatly’.
RAY: No, like changing as people, Gerard.
you both started off as chearleads and syndey ended up as a scene.
RAY: How can you end up as a view or a place where something occurs?
GERARD: She means ‘scene’ like raccoon-hair and dinosaurs. RAWR!
you, on the other hand, got an attitude and went punk.
FRANK: Don’t you dare. You’ve had my band, my babies and my wife – you can’t take punk from me as well!
even though you were two totaly diffrent people, you were still like sisters.
“we have 3 hours untill me get to the station.. what you wanna do?” you asked as you ploped down next to syndey
“lets…. play…. uh… I SPY!!!!!” she said excidely
MIKEY: Woah, periods! Where’s Pacman when you need him?
RAY: Excide means to cut. It comes from Latin. So she just said that ‘cutly’.
FRANK: Gross, I’m learning.
“fine” ypu said” I GO FIRST!!” you yelled. she nodded her head and pressed her nose agenst the window. you giggled quietly as you did the same.
“okay go!” syd said
“i spy.. something tall… and green” you said
FRANK: The Green Giant.
“tree” she said “i spy something Green and tall”
“tree” you said smiling ” i spy something kinda short and green and bro-“
MIKEY: Frank when he’s jealous.
FRANK: Hey!
“tree” she said cutting you off
“fucker” you said. the game of i spy continued untill u reached the station.
MIKEY: Was the answer tree every single time?
GERARD: They kept that up for three hours? Oh, god… I give up.
when you got there, you saw the two people you have waited to see for three years. Sure u have written them during holidays and birthdays, but those were too far between.
BOB: Why not just write more often then?
Gerard got pale.. the last time u saw him he was really tan and short. and he was tall. his hair hung in his face and he was wearing all black.
RAY: All black? Gerard, you never cease to surprise me.
Mikey had brown hair and he was wearing his glasses. he was also wearing a green day teeshirt and black skinny jeans.
“look!!!!” i yelled
RAY: Some exclamation marks had escaped and were attacking poor, innocent sentences!
pointing at mikey and gerard. when they heard me they whipped their heads around and smiled. mike ran toward me and tackled me, knocking me over
“ohmygodsammiedonteverleavemeagainoriwillhuntyoudownandkillyouandbringyoubackasadeadbody!!!” mikey said really fast
MIKEY: … so I’m insane and homicidal in this story?
GERARD: Not to mention you actually talk. I mean, what is up with that?
i smiled
“what?” i asked
“DONT LEAVE ME AGAIN!!” he shouted, getting stares from a few people
“MIKEY I LOVERS YOU I WONT LEAVE YOU AGAIN!!!” you shouted as you got up, mikey still holding u in a death grip. you looked up at your oldest brother before getting engulefd in a hug.
“YOUR KILLING ME” mikey said pushing gerard way from me.
FRANK: Gerard… way… from me. I see what they did there!
gerard pouted as i huged him tight
“i missed you” he mumbled in my ear
RAY: Add some punctuation to my order too, please.
“i missed you too!!!!” i smiled at him. i looked over at sydney who was embracing a tall blond guy whos kinda chubby.
“is that Bob?” i asked looking at them still
“yeah..” gerard said as i jumpede on his back. sydney looked at us, laughed and jumped on bobs back.
FRANK: Giddy up horsey!
“ILL RACE YOU!!” i yelled at her as mikey got a luggege cart and put mine and sydneys stuff onto it. gerard and bob ran at full speed untill we reached a car.
“GEE CAN DRIVE??????!??” you yelled as gerard got into the drivers seat
“been drivin sence i was 15” he said smiling
FRANK: Illegally.
GERARD: Shut up, Frank. At fifteen you couldn’t even reach the pedals!
“great ima die and i havnt seen mom or dad yet!” you yelled as sydney and bob got in the back seat with you. mikey slid in the passenger seat and stared at you
“what?” you asked
MIKEY: “I’m sorry, I was just wondering WHEN THE FUCK I GOT A TWIN.”
“sence when did u grow boobs???” he asked as bob stared at you. you blushed
“WHY IS MY TWIN BROTHER STARING AT MY BREASTS!!!!!!” you shouted. mike smirked and looked at bob who kept staring at your chest
GERARD: Bob! Stop staring at my kid brother’s twin’s boobs! Mikey! You too!
“Bobert stop” sydney said giggling.
RAY: Because sexual harassment is something to laugh about.
you glared at her
“your precious bobert is gunna get fed to JUSTIN!!!!!!” you shouted as sydney gasped anhd started laughing really hard. everybody stared at you two in confusement
BOB: Confusement?
FRANK: The bastard child of confusion and amusement!
RAY: Confusément is actually a word in French. It means unintelligibly.
FRANK: Again with the learning! Ew!
“j-justin w-w-was this Really b-big Gay guy who w-went t-t-to our school” sydney stammerd as she kept laughing. after a few minuets ytou two stopped laughing.
FRANK: Did I miss the funny part?
gerard laughed as you pulled up to your house.
“Syd u staying here?” you asked
“yup” she said as she took out her cell
“Gee can i stay?” Bob asked
“Sure…” he said ” as long as you dont touch Sam” he said
“its frank u gotta worry about” bob said as i ran inside.
FRANK: Hey! I don’t mess around with my friend’s relatives—
GERARD: Really? Because,Avenge.
FRANK: Shut up! I was being friendly!
when i got there i stoped in my tracks
“oh, um, hi?” you said blushing. in the middle of your living room was a boy with black hair and beautiful eyes.
FRANK: Why thank you again! Water them three times a day and you can have your very own beautiful pair.
he had a few tattoos (of that you can see) and his lip pirced. he smiled at you
“And you are?” he asked taking a step toawrd you
“Shes my sister” mikey said hugging you. he gasped
“Were twins” you said
MIKEY: Apparently. I wish I’d been informed about this.
GERARD: You’re really hung up on that, huh?
MIKEY: Of course I am! I suddenly have a twin sister! She spent nine months with her legs wrapped around me!
FRANK: Just like me and your mum.
as he looked between you and mikey
“well ur the cuter twin” he said as he winked.
MIKEY: FRANK! Stop hitting on her! That’s just awkward!
FRANK: Oh, alright. You’re definitely the cuter one anyway, Mikey.
you blushed again as sydney, bob, and gerard came into the room and turned on a green day CD……..
GERARD: DUN DUN DURR! A cliffhanger!
RAY: No, Gerard. No.
After listening to Green Day for a few hours
FRANK: Wow, I may die from sheer excitement.
and hanging out with your brothers and friends, you heard someone open the front door
“Gerard did you get your sister?” you heard your mom call. you grinned a huge grin
RAY: As opposed to grinning a huge frown.
and ran toward the front door
“Mom!” you said as she hugged you”
“Samantha, your diffrent” she said still hugging you. you nodded
“Yeah, well i guess im just like my twin brother” you said.
MIKEY: Then how are is she different?
FRANK: Mikey, do you have boobs?
MIKEY: Um, no.
FRANK: Well, there you go. There’s the difference!
she smiled and went into the kitchen to make dinner
“So what do you kids want for dinner?” she asked
“Im a Vegetarian” you said as you walked back into the living room.
FRANK: Fifteen bucks says we get together!
MIKEY: Hands off my fictional twin sister, Iero!
FRANK: Dammit. I can’t have any fun with any fictional sisters around here.
frank looked up at you
“you are?” he asked as you nodded
“yeah for about two years. i told Mikey” you said as mikey nodded
“yeah two years ago they showed this video of baby animals being killed so other people could eat” mikey said assydney
RAY: Can we just pause for a moment to appreciate ‘assydney’?
wrinkled up her nose
“thats gross” Sydney said as she played Uno with Bob and Gerard. you nodded and sat down on the couch. untill dinner was ready, you, frank, and mikey played monopoly.
GERARD: Board games! Sweet!
FRANK: Only you could get excited over Uno and Monopoly.
BOB: See, this is why we’re single in this story.
“Frank Sweetie are you staying?” your mom asked. frank smiled at her
“yes Ma’am, Mrs. Way” he said as she smiled
“okay. well dinner will be ready in a few” she said as frank nodded, rolling the dice. when he wasnt looking, i Looked at mikey and pulled out a huge bag of water balloons,
RAY: … dare I ask from where?
MIKEY: Don’t. You’ll be scarred for life.
and grinned. he smiled back and we ran into the bathroom
“What you two doing in there?” gerard asked a few minutes later
FRANK: Banging.
MIKEY: Frank! Twin sister!
FRANK: Well, the whole related thing doesn’t stop millions of Waycest stories being written.
GERARD: Way… cest?
FRANK: Ooh! You don’t know about that? One of those can be our next one!
“Were washing Charlie The Magical Unicorn” i said as i filled up a few more water balloons
“OKay then. Snorthing crack isnt good” gerard said
BOB: I don’t know, I may have to resort to it to get through this story.
RAY: … snorthing. I have nothing.
as i rolled my eyes. me and Mikey piled all the water balloons into a laundry basket and quietly opened the door. luckily everybody was outside playing tag.
RAY: Weren’t Frank and Mikey playing Monopoly?
GERARD: Yeah, and me and Bob were playing Uno!
FRANK: Obviously we were actually playing Monounotag. It gets complicated.
we went into mikeys room, which had a good view of everybody. we opened the window silently and smirked at each other.
“AHOY!!” you shouted as you started throwing balloons at your friends. mikey did the same while you soaked everybody.
MIKEY: Only she soaked everybody? What, did all mine miss then?
when you were out of water balloons, you ran downstairs to the kitchen, where your mom was sitting. you sat next to mikey as your friends came in dripping wet. you tried to hold back the smirk that tugged on your lips. frank was pouting, his black hair clinging to his face.
RAY: “I will not let go!” it screamed as Frank tried to pry the strands of crazy hair away from his mouth. Slowly, choking and coughing, he sunk to the floor, unable to breath. His hair killed him out of mercy so he wouldn’t have to suffer this story any longer.
“Samantha, Micahel. that wasnt nice” your mom said looking at you. you looked at your brother who looked back….
GERARD: Then looked at Gerard who looked at Charlie the Magical Unicorn who looked at—
RAY: No, Gerard. No.
GERARD: I felt left out.
